Archive | March 2013

…I think I found the pause button…

Oh my God does it feel good to just sit down and zone out for like 5 seconds! Feels like I’ve been going non stop for forever now. Mom is finally home from the hospital and seems to be doing much better. Her breathing still gets bad from time to time, but she is at least back to her semi normal self. Also she has hardly smoked (and as far as I can prove actually hasn’t at all) in the last 2 weeks. Hopefully she continues to recover and becomes a happier, healthier person… especially happier… her bitchiness is really starting to wear on me.

Also it seems I got a slight break in my work schedule. I don’t have an actual day off till Sunday but I only work one job a day till Friday where I work both back to back. One shift a day seems to be about all I can physically and mentally handle lately. I’m just getting burned out. Running the whole house, making dinners, running errands, working, and having a social life are just all too much when it’s just thrown on you. I give mad props to all the mamas out there that do this and more every day! It’s going to take me a bit to get that bad ass.

And as of right now, I’m sitting here in my yoga pants and baggy Tshirt waiting for the rest of my tax money to hit my account. I swear I’ve been checking it every half hour since the first check hit Saturday. I can’t wait to get that money so I can go take my drivers test and stop driving around illegally.  Then maybe I can find one really awesome job instead of working 2 cool, yet low paying jobs. I’ve actually been thinking about possibly trying to throw a third job in the mix, just because I need the money but I don’t know how I would do it unless I stopped sleeping. I promise no one wants to see that though, me and sleep are best friends, take us away from each other for too long and I’ll stab a bitch.

So this is all you guys are getting out of me tonight, just a quick “hey, I’m not dead” post with a personal update. I’ll try to write something more meaningful tomorrow, especially if I’m not needed for my on call shift.

#first30songsonshuffle

1. Thrift Shop

2. American Bad Ass

3. Pumped Up Kicks

4. Work It

5. This is the New Shit

6. Rolling in the Deep

7. Xxplosive

8. S&M

9. Big Pimpin

10. Sweet Nothing

11. Too Close

12. I Love It

13. Man Eater

14. Everybody Talks

15. Blow Me

16. Comin in Hot

17. One More Night

18. Sail

19. Creepin

20. Kyoto

21. Bass Down Low

22. The Way You Move

23. Somebody that I Used to Know

24. Kush

25. Power & Control

26. Swimming Pools

27. Only You

28. Some Nights

29. Hell on Heels

30. Blue Jeans

Personal Update

So, it’s been a hot second since I have had time to post, I’m so sorry. I’ve been on a 13 day stretch working both jobs, one or the other or both every day. I can’t wait till my vacation this weekend. It will be nice to run away with some friends.

I’ve been working on a lot of new projects, but haven’t finished any yet. I kind of feel like life is slipping away from me and no matter how hard I try to catch up, I just can’t. Life is really tripping me out right now. I don’t know what to do.

It seems all the people around me that I love are getting everything I ever wished for, which makes me so happy for them, but so sad for me. I keep telling myself that things will happen when they are meant to but I’m getting so tired of waiting. EVERYTHING is at a stand still for me. Can’t I move forward in at least one place?